Archive for poetry

Parenting Is A Creative Act

// April 27th, 2010 // 2 Comments » // creative parent, creativity, curiosity, poetry

One of my favourite creative moments came just before the birth of our second son. My wife had been on bed rest for much of the second half of a very complicated pregnancy, and there were a few scares involving rushed trips to the hospital towards the end. Our oldest son had just turned three and was pretty freaked out by all of this.

We were playing in the yard and talking about how he didn’t want us to leave him to go to the hospital when his brother was born. At the time, one of his favourite toys was a Spiderman ball. So we got the sidewalk chalk and I drew a huge version of the Superhero on the driveway right by our front door, and told Finn that Spiderman was here to protect him.

Finn still had a hard time with the birth and the settling in of the new baby. The drawing helped at least a little, and he was happy to have it there. But beyond any talismanic protection Spiderman offered, the real value in this moment, at least for me, was that for a moment he knew that I was trying to understand what he was going through and doing something about that.

Creativity is much more than coming up with a great idea, or completing a piece of art. It infuses the way we walk in the world. Do we live as fully present as possible,in a way that embraces curiosity, imagination, and a sense of wonder at our surroundings?

Parenting is the ultimate creative act. It’s a wild place to be. You get to witness the creative energy streaming out of young children, as they explore the world and process it in the most amazing and unpredictable ways. What a joy to watch and participate in that!

But being a parent can, at times, feel like being stuck in the most uncreative place in the world. Where you’re stressed out, sleep deprived, shuffling from demand to demand like a zombie. You start wondering whether you’ll ever get some space just to be yourself again. Or if your creative days may be over.

As parents and creative people these are the two poles we swing between. But there are ways that we can allow the spirit of creativity to be continuously present, and even make it a haven in a chaotic life.

Commit! (to not doing your art)

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This is the one that makes all the difference to me. If I’m minding the boys and racing around making bottles, picking up toys, and fetching snacks while trying to work out an illustration or blog post in my head, all I end up doing is to make myself intensely frustrated. And resentful.

When I let go of my creative goals and commit fully to the fact that this is just Dad-time, then things get much easier. Just dropping the need to do my own thing (which would never happen anyway) relieves me of a huge amount of stress and frustration.

Something that really helps here is realizing that letting go of my creative goals means simply loosening my grip, not throwing them away.

Over time I’m really coming to trust in the wisdom of my unconscious mind. When I have a block of time where I’m looking after the boys I try to set a creative intention for my subconscious. If my next blog post is on parenting and creativity, I’ll just pop a simple question in like, what themes should I explore for that post? Then I let go and trust that something, no matter how small, will be bubbling away down there ready for me to retrieve when I have some writing time.

This allows me to be more fully present with the boys and not half-there to them while sorting out ideas. For me, being split like that guarantees this will be a day where I suck at both parenting and creating.

Surf Your Child’s Creative Energy

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Children have a lot to teach us about living creatively. Dinosaurs happen to be a big thing in our house. My son has corrected me, and I now understand that that they are not actually extinct, but very much alive. And, in fact, they live in our garden.

I’ve been on a number of dinosaur hunts with our older son and it’s great to walk around the garden trying to see things from his perspective. Puddles become Triceratops footprints, our cedar tree’s scattered twigs become fossilised dinosaur bones.

The world becomes larger as I crouch down to see bushes, rocks and tress from the perspective of a four year old. The world becomes more magical and alive as I drop my weary notions about dinosaurs and participate in a world where the ground still shakes with their every step.

Recalibrate Your Relationship to Time

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A few years ago I was consistently spending at least 2-3 hours a day on writing poetry. I had plenty of time to read books of poetry, and books on poetry, and got to hang out and participate on poetry forums. Add to this well many hours spent sketching and daydreaming, occasional visits to art galleries. I had all the creative time in the world.

I’m glad I had that too. I’m hoping one day to have that kind of luxury again.

But, now I have to make the most of every second I get. I’ve learned to work in 25 minute increments. Where I used to allow myself outrageous periods of incubation time, now I just snatch whatever moments I can. The surprising result is, I’m much more decisive an artist than I was a few years ago, and can feel myself sharpening up creatively.

Be Kind To Yourself

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While training to be a Creativity Coach, the first thing I was taught was to meet others where they’re at. The second thing was to practice self coaching. This involves asking a lot of questions of myself:

Can I meet myself where I’m at? Which of my creative goals are realistic right now? What small thing can I do to build some creating time for myself? What things I can prioritise? Do I have the support I need?

Most importantly can I be kind to myself? Even in simple ways like negotiating breaks with my wife, allowing myself a hot shower, clean clothes, healthy foods each day. (I’ve let all three of these slide by on too many occasions)

*****

I gladly chose to be a husband and a parent and this is my life’s major creative project. Even though some difficulties arise with this path, every single day I get swept up in the joy and privilege of seeing my two beautiful sons grow, and take part in helping them to shape their lives.

What can be more creative than that?

*****

If there are parents reading this I’d love to hear what you do to maintain your creative life as you raise your children. What difficulties do you face? What great successes have you had?

The Pyjama-Clad Dragon Slayer

// December 22nd, 2009 // 3 Comments » // creativity, curiosity, poetry, reading

if-tales-publish

I was 8 years old when I had the most amazing reading experience I’ve ever had.


Deep in the middle of Enid Blyton’s ‘Five On A Treasure Island’  the five young protaganists were camping on Kirrin Island when a huge storm hit. They watched in horror from the cliffs as the huge swells lifted up and tossed a long-ago shipwrecked vessel onto the beach.


Engrossed, I could hear the smashing rain as wind gales rocked our house and flashes of lightning seared the pages of my book. I was actually lying on the hallway floor in our house in Brisbane, Australia, reading my book as the devastating floods of 1974 struck the city.

I remember going for a walk with my mother the next day. As we turned the corner a block away from our house and just a little down the hill,we stopped to look and just beside us was a small frog sitting in a puddle staring up at me, every thing turned slow and eerily quiet. I looked up and saw row upon row of houses underwater with nothing showing but the peaks of their roofs.


I remember the frog and the flooded houses very vividly, but I also remember the scene from the book just as, if not more, vividly.


That was a pretty extreme reading experience but reading has always been intense for me. Opening up a book and dissolving into the story nestled in the thin sheets of paper between the covers has always been a favourite past-time.

I have a similar deep love for visual art, but never seem to get the same intimacy from viewing a painting as I do from immersing myself in a book. There’s always an element of separation when viewing a painting. The canvas is there and I’m here. No matter how engrossing and inspiring the artwork it’s much more difficult to place myself inside a painting. When reading I become the canvas. I become co-conspirator and collaborator. The author needs me as much as I need her in order to get this piece of art off the ground.


Our innate capacity for creativity is made apparent as soon as we open up a book.

In my reading life I’ve hustled for gruel and survived frostbite in Russian Gulags, been stranded on tropical islands, roamed the halls of a 14th Century Italian monastery, railed at passers-by in the streets of 19th century Kristiania, hitched a ride to the restaurant at the end of the universe, joined the foreign Legion, stalked vampires, and slain dragons–all while wearing pyjamas and nursing a cup of tea.


Each of these acts relied on my ability to take in the writer’s words and use them as scaffolding to build entire worlds. After being given the address of the cafe, the beverage and the name of my companion it’s up to me to create the scent of coffee, the hub-bub surrounding our conversation, the sharp intake of her breath as the conversation takes a turn.

We’re amazing, us readers. Consider the millions of dollars and painstaking attention to detail that movies like the Harry Potter and Lord Of The Rings series need to invest to come close to achieving what we can with our our imaginations and a twelve dollar book. Consider the amount of money James Cameron just dropped in making ‘Avatar’ (unless you think 250 million dollars is inconceivable).

Writers are my heroes, many are brilliant and they’re often treated that way too. What I find amazing is that while writers are so adored, readers are, well, just readers.While preparing this post I wanted to get some inspirational quotes on the creative act of reading and how awesome readers are. I was surprised at the Snark and Boo that google actually offered up:


“It is not all books that are as dull as their readers.”


Henry David Thoreau


“Readers are plentiful: thinkers are rare.”


Anthony Burgess (Didn’t he play the Penguin in the T.V. series of Batman?)


But a bit further on I found this:


“Every man who knows how to read has it in his power to magnify himself, to multiply the ways in which he exists, to make his life full, significant and interesting”


Aldous Huxley


Finally, something positive about the capacity of readers. Actually, I think all people (not just male readers), share the qualities that Aldous Huxley mentions. I’m not saying that only people who read are wonderfully creative beings, just that the act of reading provides an illustration of the imaginative abilities we all share as a result of being human.


I love this quote from Annie Dillard:


A well-known writer got collared by a university student who asked, “Do you think I could be a writer?” “Well,” the writer said, “I don’t know ….Do you like sentences?”


After wanting to be a writer all my life, I read those words a few years ago and felt I had finally had been handed the starting point. That quote opened the doorway into writing for me. It also opened the doorway into a deeper love of reading as well. The way I read has become more thoughtful and rewarding since I started paying attention to the building blocks of writing.

But I didn’t put the quote in here to talk about writing. The thing I hear most in reading about creativity in books and on blogs, and what I heard so much of when doing Creativity Coaching sessions with clients, were different forms of the question “Can I be a creative?” One way I’d like to reply to that is “I don’t know, do you like to read?”

My favourite piece of writing on the writer/reader relationship is a poem by Olena Kalytiak Davis called: sweet reader, flanneled and tulled

It’s not a cheer-squad poem for readers it’s darker and more complicated than that, which kind of mirrors the nature of the relationship. But if you’ve read this far I’d like to quote the opening of the poem for you, in gratitude:

Reader unmov’d and Reader unshaken, Reader unseduc’d
and unterrified, through the long-loud and the sweet-still
I creep toward you. Toward you, I thistle and I climb.


Flying

// October 12th, 2009 // 4 Comments » // illustration friday, poetry

fly IF

FLY

This morning Maria clings to the boughs of the thick-limbed cedar

outside her house. Neighbours on their lawns look up, faces calm,

feet clamped to grass. She envies them: their solidity,

their white appliance weight, their children sand-bagged snug

across their hips. Her feet lift with the breeze. Her face strains

as the wind whips through her nightshirt. One slipper

spirals down to be thrashed by two chocolaty daschunds eager

to prove their worth. The fire truck arrives with ladders and hoses,

orders fly through megaphones as the women organise

a flannel gathering by the firemen. Maria, forgotten, lifts one finger,

then another. Lets her flesh untwine from the bark and floats

above the street, above green cubed yards filled with whirling women

and men moving in formation. She feels the air, fresh on her face, feels

weightlessness, feels herself lifted and carried away.